


Dream With Everything

by Epiphanyx7



Category: Merlin (BBC)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Angst, F/M, Gen, Gender Issues, Genderfuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-06-10
Updated: 2009-06-09
Packaged: 2017-10-16 20:24:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/168997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Epiphanyx7/pseuds/Epiphanyx7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. Arthur is a pretty princess. No. Srsly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Dragon's Call

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if I'll ever finish this, so I may as well post it, right? Also. Ew. I just realized I accidentally committed het - which, yes, is the only logical conclusion in a story like this. However. It weirds me out a bit. Title from the song "This One's For the Girls" by Martina McBride.

When he sees a servant being bullied, Merlin steps in because his mother raised him to know right from wrong, and no filthy blond-haired brat is going to harass a peasant in front of him, not even if that brat happens to be of noble blood. And this noble, a young boy barely out of short pants, backed up by a few of the knights who are laughing as if they found the whole situation funny, just makes Merlin's head spin and his blood boil.

"You've had your fun, my friend." He says, because the servant looks cowed and miserable. It says something about the sort of place Camelot is, if the servants are afraid to be defended by a stranger against one of their own.

"Do I know you?" The scruffy, childish-looking boy demands. He's soft-looking, probably no older than fourteen, not yet enough of a man to shave. He's wearing a cap, too, which is unusual in this heat.

"Uh, I'm Merlin," He says, trying to be friendly. (He knows it's not going to end well. It never does, with nobles, but the effort usually means he won't get beaten nearly as badly.)

"So, I don't know you." The child retorts, fury distorting his features.

"No--"

"Yet, you called me _friend_ ," He continues, barreling through Merlin's explanation.

"That -- was my mistake." Merlin replies, smiling tensely and hating this stupid child, spoiled noble who thinks that Camelot is his own playground.

"Yes, I think so." 

"Yeah, I'd never have a friend who can be such an ass," Merlin adds, turning to walk away.

"Or I one who could be so stupid," The child responds, advancing towards Merlin even though Merlin had more than a few inches of height on the younger boy. "Tell me, Merlin, do you know how to walk on your knees?"

"No ---"

"Would you like me to help you?"

Things go straight downhill from there, because Merlin sure as hell won't use magic in public, not after he just saw a man executed - murdered - for that same 'crime', and he doesn't think that it's very sporting to wail on a younger, smaller child just because he's in the right. Regardless, the boy is strong, even if his features are soft and delicate. He twists Merlin's arm behind his back, forcing him down onto his knees, and things take a turn for the worse when the boy leans forward and whispers, "I could have you put in jail for that," 

"What--" Merlin asks, and then the kid is letting him go, stepping back. Merlin scrambles to his feet, and he sees a tall, dark-haired young man enter the square.

"What's going on here?" The dark-haired man demands, a dark scowl on his face, one hand on the pommel of his sword.

"Morgan," The blond kid says, a guilty look on his face. "We were just - uh -- having some fun."

"Who are you," Morgan (probably a lord of some sort, or a knight at least) turns to Merlin, his scowl deepening into something like fury. "and what are you doing here?"

"I'm Merlin," He is a lot intimidated by this man, for no reason other than the look he's being given, as if Morgan knows something about him, something Merlin would rather be kept secret. "I - um. I work with Gaius? The court physician?" It comes out sounding like a question, even though it's definitely the truth.

"Was he bothering you?" Morgan turns back to the noble brat.

"No," The brat responds, and his cheeks colour, almost as if he's embarrassed.

Merlin's shocked that the kid isn't tattling on him, demanding he be thrown into the stocks or the dungeons, but Morgan turns and looks at him, then nods. "I suppose it would be good to have the physician's apprentice around, in case you were hurt." He says. "Just be careful, Ig-- Arthur. And stay with the knights."

Arthur and his knights leave soon after, glaring at Merlin but leaving him with his trousers covered in dust, and the servant he'd saved from humiliation gone, run off somewhere before the scuffle.

What the hell kind of place is Camelot anyway, Merlin wonders.

-

In his sleep, voices whisper to him. _Merlin_ , they say. _MERLIN_.

-

The first time Merlin sees the princess, she is walking down the hallway followed by her maid and a lady-in-waiting. Her hair is elaborately coiffed and pinned, arranged to expose the nape of her neck with a single, perfect coil of curls draped artfully over her shoulder. She moves gracefully, the long sleeves of her gown trailing just over the floor, and her golden cloak billows out behind her majestically. She is almost unearthly beautiful, it seems.

She walks straight ahead, her eyes not looking at a single person even as they bow and scrape and move out of her way. She walks as if she's the only person in the room, and when she turns the corner and sees Merlin, their eyes meet for a single moment.

He drops to one knee, bows his head, because it's one thing to mouth off in the courtyard and another thing to offend the princess, and Merlin likes his head on his shoulders and Gaius keeps telling him to keep out of trouble. Except, the princess doesn't walk on by, she stops in front of him, dark ruby-red slippers with golden embroidery just at the edge of his vision.

"You, there," and her voice is a bit deeper than he'd expected, a lot more authoritative. "My maid seems to have dropped her handkerchief."

Merlin looks up and sees a plain white handkerchief not a few feet away, he scrambles over and returns it to the maid. She's a sweet-looking girl with dark skin and dark hair, and she smiles at him shyly.

"My lady-in-waiting seems to have dropped her embroidery," the princess says pointedly, and stands and watches as Merlin scrambles around, attempting to find the tiny needle and the missing piece of gold thread.

"Oh, dear," she says, knocking it out of his hand when he tries to return it. Needles and thread spill over the hallway, and Merlin looks up at her, furious. She smiles, satisfied, and then she gestures for the maid to help him retrieve them.

"That - was a very brave thing you did," The maid whispers at him as they carefully pick up the needles. "Yesterday - with. I mean, you don't seem the type to be into unnecessary heroics - not that it was unnecessary, and not that you aren't brave - because you are, obviously, what you did yesterday was extraordinary, I just wanted to say. Um. I'm - Guinevere. You can call me Gwen."

"I'm Merlin," he whispers back, handing her the rest of the embroidery and letting her go on her way.

-

"How's your knee-walking coming along?" Arthur taunts when Merlin passes by him and his cronies in the marketplace.

Merlin grits his teeth and keeps walking, reminding himself that he can not afford to get into trouble.

"Oh, don't run away," Arthur groans, fake-disappointment dripping from his voice.

"From _you_?" Merlin responds, stopping.

Things swiftly go downhill.

"You _can't_ address me like that," Arthur says, shocked and maybe a little amused. 

Merlin pauses. He ducks his head, makes his body language as subservient as he possibly can (not very, Hunith didn't raise a coward or an idiot) and looks through his lashes at Arthur, whose eyes have suddenly gone very wide. "I'm sorry," he says, dropping his voice low and husky. "How long have you been training to be a prat, _my lord_?" 

Some of the people around them laugh at that, and Arthur laughs as well, before he swings the mace at Merlin's head.

-

(Merlin has never even touched a mace previously. He thinks that all things concerned, a little bit of illicit, surreptitious magic-use is only evening the playing field.)

-

Arthur falls backwards, hard, and Merlin says "Do you want to give up?" He can feel the shame radiating off of Gaius in the crowd, and he knows he's going to get in a lot of trouble for this, but it's the principal of the matter.

And then Arthur is standing up, armed with a broom, and he takes Merlin out with a few well-aimed blows.

"Ow," Merlin says, knights dragging him back to his feet.

"Let him go," Arthur orders, and Merlin is surprised when they obey him - because surely Arthur's just a child? Close up, though, Arthur is almost as tall as Merlin, and only a little bit thinner, and Merlin thinks that maybe the boy is sixteen or seventeen, a young man instead of a child. "He may be an idiot, but at least he's a brave one."

"There's something about you, Merlin," Arthur says as he turns to leave. "I can't quite put my finger on it."

-

Later, much later, Merlin will think about how heavy chainmail is and how hot it must be to wear a cap all the time, and he wonders why Arthur does both. Most of the knights don't even wear chain-mail, they just put on their plates and gauntlets over their shirts for practice.

-

In the middle of the night, Merlin wakes up to a memory of Arthur pulling himself off of the ground, a long strand of dirty blond hair falling from under the cap. It had fallen forward, onto his shoulder. Something about that was familiar.

And then he discovers the giant, ferocious, incredibly batshit insane dragon living underneath the castle.

"You and Arthur have a destiny!" The dragon announces, and then it laughs and laughs and laughs.

-

At the banquet, Princess Igraine is poised and icy, beautiful like a statue and about as friendly. Lord Morgan avoids her and she avoids him, both changing directions so that they never have to speak to each other. The only person Merlin can even speak to at the stupid banquet is Gwen, and she stammers her way into a corner and ends up flushing horribly every time he looks at her for absolutely no reason.

And then a crazy witch-woman wielding a knife attempts to assassinate Igraine, and it's purely chance that leaves Merlin able to shake off the spell and yank hard on the princess's shoulder, pulling her out of the way.

Time goes back to normal speed with Merlin flat on his back, arms above his head, and the princess sprawled out on top of him, mouth slightly open and her eyes wide. They are very, very blue eyes, her blond hair is clean and falling in waves over her shoulder, spilling onto Merlin's neck as she stares, shocked, into his eyes.

There's chaos around them, Uther demanding that people do stuff about the witch's corpse, other people yelling and screaming in terror or confusion, but Merlin is fairly certain that the only thing that matters is the soft weight of Princess Igraine on top of him.

She's heavier than he thought she'd be.

She's also not moving, which is a problem, and Merlin is afraid to move his hands or even blink, because he might accidentally insult her honor and end up being executed even if he did just save her life. She has one hand fisted, pressing into the fabric of his shirt directly over his heart.

"You saved my daughter's life," Uther says, helping the princess to her feet. Merlin scrambles to his, tries to look at his own feet or Uther's feet or even Igraine's feet, but she is standing beside her father, looking between him and Merlin with a confused expression on his face.

"No--" Merlin tries to protest. Uther barrels right over him, talking about his bravery and whatnot, and all but demands that Merlin accept a reward.

"You shall be awarded a position in the royal household!" Uther says, smiling. "You shall be - Princess Igraine's footman!" And he sweeps off in a majestic swirl of his cloak, off to do kingly things, and leaves Igraine in his wake, mouth opening and closing in horror.  
 _  
A footman?_

Merlin doesn't even know what that _is_.

-


	2. Valiant

"I'm the princess's maid, " Gwen explains later. "So I have to help her dress, bathe, all the - um, normal activities of life. You, sadly, are the only male in Igraine's retinue at the moment, so all the manly duties fall to you. Taking care of her horse, escorting her on her rides and hunting trips, sending messages, assisting her in mounting and dismounting from her horse, and - well."

"Well?" Merlin asks, curious.

Gwen smiles. "There's more to Princess Igraine than meets the eye," She says. "I suppose you'll find out what that means, later."

-

Arthur is fighting imaginary monsters in an empty practice ring when Merlin sees him next.

"Merlin!" He yells, waving a sword. "Get armor on and spar with me!"

He doesn't have to, of course, but Merlin has a suspicion that there's something about Arthur he's not quite putting together, and the fact that Arthur just expects everyone to do his bidding is only slightly worrisome and definitely intriguing. Merlin grabs a chain shirt and a helmet, and sparring with Arthur is exactly as humiliating an experience as he thought it would be.

Arthur is good - strong, flexible, and almost unbelievably fast, landing a flurry of blows that Merlin doesn' thave the slightest idea how to defend himself against. Within five minutes, Merlin feels as if he's going to be beaten black and blue, bruised all over. Every single time he picks himself up, though, Arthur's eyes end up more and more pleased, a smile hovering over his lips. "Again," he says, and Merlin groans but lets the noble boy beat on him.

"I'm going to enter the tournament," And when Merlin turns to look at him, he sees the sparkle in Arthur's sea-blue eyes, the flush on his cheeks, and he realizes that Arthur is indeed a lot more than he seems.

Arthur is Princess Igraine.

Arthur is Kink Uther's only child, heir, and precious daughter.

Arthur is going to enter the tournament.

"Oh bloody hell," Merlin says, and makes a mental note to find all of Arthur's (or perhaps he should be calling her Igraine?) armor and reinforcing it with magic.

-

Two knights withdraw from the tournament when they see Arthur has presented himself. One of them is Lord Morgan. The other one, Sir Ewan, has a look of such intense disappointment on his face, as if he thinks he could win, but not against Arthur.

"It's not fair," Merlin says to Arthur, later, helping him into his armor (and even with her breasts bound, it's obvious Igraine is female until she puts on the tight leather shirt and the chain-mail on top).

Arthur looks at him with one eyebrow raised. "I've fought Ewan before," He says. "He would have lost."

-

Merlin's fairly certain Arthur - Igraine - isn't as good as he - she - thinks she is. She's probably a decent fighter, but she's a woman and a princess besides, so it's too easy to think that the other men have simply been letting her win, taking it easy on her.

He was wrong.

Arthur doesn't just hold his own in the tournament, he dominates it. Most of the other men - knights trained outside of Camelot, with no idea of who Arthur is, or why two of Camelot's knights withdrew from the running - fall quickly, and later they talk about Arthur's prowess with a sword in awed tones.

The look - pure, impotent fury - on Uther's face is terrifying enough that Merlin is almost breathless with fear while Arthur battles foe after foe. The fact that Arthur wins - continuously - does nothing to amend the fact that the seat beside Uther is curiously empty, Gwen making apologies to the king and saying that "Her Highness is feeling a bit ill, and sends this token to her Champion, Sir Arthur....?"

Nobody attempts to stop her, though, which is probably because if Uther were to uncover the truth in front of all these witnesses, Igraine's reputation would be tarnished beyond repair. He may be an angry, bitter man, but even Uther is not foolhardy enough to ruin his own daughter.

-

It's purely by accident that Merlin walks by Sir Valiant's rooms, and sees him standing in front of a shield with the snakes slithering outwards, eating a mouse he dangles enticingly in front of their not-quite-living faces.

"Oh, bloody hell," Merlin swears, and runs off to tell Igraine.

-

It's a singular honor that he's allowed in the Princess's Suite, and only then in the presence of her Lady-in-Waiting or her Lady's maid. Fortunately, Merlin's used to ignoring convention.

Igraine is sitting, poised, in a blue day-dress, her face composed. "What are you doing in here?" She asks, curiously.

"Sir Valiant has a magic shield and he's using it to win the tournament," Merlin says. "Oh, and your father is going to kill you, by the way."

Igraine looks away. "I have no idea what you are speaking about," She says coolly.

"Right," Merlin rethinks his previous statement. "Sir Valiant has a magical shield and he's using it to win the tournament. Snakes come out of it and probably bite people and are poisonous or whatever, so that would be bad. Especially, your highness, if something were to happen to Arthur. You know, your champion?"

And Igraine freezes, face struggling to maintain neutrality. "I see," She says.  


"Don't get me wrong," Merlin adds. "Because Arthur - for all that he's a complete and utter prat, as much as waste of air as you are, your highness, I still don't want him to die because Valiant can't win on his own."

"Noted," Igraine says. "And if you ever insult me again, I'll have you thrown in the stocks."

-

"You can't fight him!" Merlin yells at Arthur.

"If I withdraw, people will think I'm a coward," Arthur responds. "And - and then I won't be able to stay here. None of the knights will respect me, I'll become--"

"I really don't think that anyone wants you dead." Merlin says, because Igraine is the damned princess, and too valuable to die in some stupid tournament.

"I'd rather die," She responds angrily.

"Igraine," Merlin says. 

She spins around, eyes flashing angrily. "Arthur," She hisses. "You call me Arthur - and never make a mistake like that again, I will have you killed, Merlin!"

He nods. 

"I'd rather be dead and ruined than trapped in her life," She says. "I'd rather be dead, Merlin, and if I die --- if I die... then, so be it."

-

Merlin wants to accuse Valiant directly, except he's a servant and his word is worthless. He doesn't have any proof, and Valiant was angry enough with Merlin just in the same room as his shield. He's running out of ideas, and then he thinks "Right, just expose him to everyone while keeping your own secret, you fool."

He even practices the spell on a stone dog he stole from the courtyard.

Gaius would be proud.

-

When night has already fallen, the spell won't work.

-

Midnight. The spell won't work. Merlin buries his face in his hands and tries to imagine how he's going to explain to Uther that yes, he knew that the princess was fighting in a tournament, and yes, that was dangerous, and yes, she'd died - but it wasn't Merlin's fault.

Somehow, the scenario in his head always ends with Merlin being beheaded in the courtyard.

-

Dawn breaks and the spell won't work and Merlin's head is swimmy with exhaustion. "I hate you," he tells the stone dog before he turns back to the magic spell book and tries to read the words as they weave and bob in front of his eyes.

-

He's half asleep, but there is a large, vicious dog in his room, and the statue is nowhere to be seen.

"I did it!" Merlin crows, triumphant, and then he scrambles to his feet and bolts out the door.

-

When Arthur kills Valiant, there's silence in the courtyard. Arthur turns to Morgan, returns his sword, and then stalks off. Merlin scrambles to follow him, chasing him all the way into the castle and halfway to his rooms.

"Are you okay?" he asks, as Arthur stalks boldly through the hallway.

"Merlin," Arthur hisses, teeth gritted together. "Follow me and for god's sake, shut up!"

They stumble into Igraine's rooms, where Gwen is waiting with a bowl full of water and a worried expression. "Thank god you're back," Gwen says, looking at Merlin while she speaks. "Are you okay?"

"No," Arthur says, while Gwen and Merlin both begin to take off the armour. The chain shirt follows soon after, and then the rest of Arthur's clothes. Underneath, she is wearing a tightly laced leather corset, flattening her chest.

It occurs to Merlin that he should probably be grovelling or averting his eyes or something, but Igraine's body is covered with dark, mottled bruises, cuts and scratches from the armor. "Help me get this thing off," She gasps, gesturing at Gwen.

Gwen tries to untie it, but Merlin interrupts with a dagger and cuts the laces clean off-- those, at least, are easy enough to replace.

The bruises covering Igraine's chest and back are from pure force, the strength of the blows she has withstood throughout the course of the tournament. In places, the chainmail dug in so deeply it cut her. In others, she simply wasn't fast enough. Gwen bathes her wounds, eyes wide with concern, and Igraine makes irrational demands of Merlin.

"I'm not a bloody physician!" He yells. "What do you expect me to do?"

"Steal the balms and elixirs if you must," Igraine orders him. "I don't care if Gaius will be furious. You cannot - cannot tell him. If he comes to tend to my wounds, everyone will know, and I will be ruined."

"You're bloody well lucky to be alive!" Merlin snaps, stomping out of her chambers to go and do exactly that.

-

Princess Igraine moves very gracefully at the banquet, her lovely face lightly powdered and lips outlined in red. Merlin thinks that he can see a tiny bit of swelling near her lip, but he maybe sort-of convinced Gaius to show him how to magically enhance the bruise balm, so it's a lot less noticeable than it should have been.

She stays away from Uther. The King does not demand her presence or even comment at all, aside from a terse "I see you have recovered from your ailment," spoken at the beginning of dinner. Merlin replaces Gwen halfway through the meal, pouring wine liberally into Igraine's goblet, unwatered, in order to deal with the pain.

She is mostly silent.

"Thank you, Sir Morgan," She says, when he comes to ask her to dance.

"It would be my pleasure, milady," He responds.

The way Igraine flinches every single time she's forced to take a turn on the floor tells Merlin more than he really needed to know about the relationship between Sir Morgan and the princess.

-  



End file.
